Kin

I walk down the street and see your black skin
and know that we are african kin

Stolen from our home of freedom and prosperity
Brought to a land where our rituals were barbarity

Worked over by the caucasian race
beaten, bruised and disgraced

Once freed, we really weren't
because we were recurrently discrimenated and emotionally burnt

Made fools of by corporations
where we suffered cultural castration

Labled drug-dealers and hoes
then told to act as those roles in shows

You are my kin
So stand tall and have thick skin

Don't you bow your head down once you're looked down at
but look back and fight the battle

Stand up tall because you're my kin
because beauty is in the eye of the beholder and beauty is your skin

East Africa

Skin Deep Dark and Lovely
Deepend by the the rays of the hot african sun
Chocolate, Mahconey, and hazelnut all in one

Skin Deep Dark and Lovely
Worked over, and abused
Now faded and bruised

Skin Deep Dark and Lovely
The cover of a caged soul
T'ill it self distructs and turns to coal

Skin Deep Dark and Lovely
Standing tall
while others are appalled

Complex

I am complex
an andetermined intellegtual
I am complex
made of nomads in a nomadic country
I am complex
Guided by a religion of peace
I am complex
locked in a soul of unnerving beauty
I am complex
With a skin that stands out in a sea of whit
I am complex
tried to put me in a box and you will see that
I am complex

Disappointment

Disappointment: The ability of letting down something, someone, or somewhere. The greatest disappointment in life is the one that you put on yourself.

When

When I was a little kid I had many dreams
I dreamed of being an African Princess
Than I dreamed of being a writer and telling my story to anyone that would here it
I dreamed of Prince Charming and being his cindrella
I dreamed of Changing the world
I dreamed of Winning all that my parents had lost
When I was a little kid I had many dreams
But those dreams are nothing but fantasies now
They tell me Africans can't be Princesses
They tell me Black isn't beautiful
My writting can't stand up to their big words
And my prince charming is a drug-dealer
My parents grew old and tired
And that little girl works a 9-5
Sitting at her desk thinking
Thinking
About the dreams she gave up

Dreams

Dreams are what the world is made of
Then Why are my dreams not making the world
Dreams are what the world is made of
But mine are just flooting around with no home
Dreams are what the world made of
But Dreams are not what the world operates on

Bumped

I am so bumped I can't believe that I am this bumped. I got my marks and my average is about 76%. OMG. I should just give up on my dream, you know. I am more and more confused each day. I always promise myself that I will do better, yet that never happens. It's like something is against me or something. Like there is a bad omen that is out there waiting to get me or something. Why is it that i can't stop talking lots of shit for ya know. I get people to think that I am like the best english student out there, but then the dumpest people are getting higher marks than me. It's like every night I say to myself today is the day that you get your ass off the couch and do some work, but that never works out for me. I am still sitting there twenty minutes later wondering why i am still sitting there. Then to add on to all this shit I have the most unsupportive friends on earth. OMG it's like they live to put me down or something. They make themselves out to be all religious or something, while doing everything against religion that they could possibly do. Teacher who i thought cared about me don't. Teachers say that they like all students the same, but i believe that they are human and therefore they are biased to some degree. I don't know if my dream will come true or not, but I promise myself that starting right noe I am going to chang who I am. Cause I can't prove them right. I am not only fighting one, but a whole culture that is just waiting for me to fail you know. And I won't let them be victorius. I won't let them bring me down. There is still one report card to go and I will try my harderest to raise all coming up subjects, and spend all my time from noe on in the library just reading. That's all I have to say for now, but there will be more to come later.

airport

We went to the airport and u promised u wouldn't yell
We were happy for half an hour with no drama
We went in line and got our bags
Then we waited to get ur tickt stamped
Y then do I ask u broke ur promise
We weren't even an hour into the time u promised
I tried to stop u
but u didn't listen
I tried to hold u
but u pulled away
latlely I see more and more disappointment in ur eyes
like u gave up on life
but don't cauz i am here
and i will take care of u
ur yelling made me sad
u made me cry
u made him cry
it was all her fault
it always is
she doesn't care about me
she never did
they say the greatest bond that god create is da one between mother and child
yet i feel like he skipped me cauz we are not in that situation
she is slowly killing u
but u don't know it
or u do
but are just to old and tired to fight back
she doesnt understand our bond
or why i want u to stay with me as long as u can
u are sick
both physically and emotionaly
I hope u free me one day so I won't me haunted by ur dreams
I hope

life

I haven't posted for a while, but I just need time to be alone and think to my self. I am sooo stressed and don't know how I am still holding on to things. There are days were I want to give up on my school work, give up on my parents and there false expectation, give up on ever having a careet dat I love and enjoy. Nothing I do is good enough. I am always asked to do better, but I am done with all dat right now. Why is it that the only jobs that are worth regonition in this household are Doctors and Engineers. I suck in mathm and anything science related. I tell myself that I will work harder, but every day I don't. I tell myself that there will come a day when I show them all. ahhhh. I am confused.Extremely.